a musing ames

Rocket at the Kennedy Space Center near Orlando, Florida.

Today marks the 40th anniversary of the first landing on the moon, and those uttered words that we will always remember, “one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.”  My mind goes back to a visit at the Kennedy Space Center, where they shared the clip from JFK’s speech that inspired the whole journey into outer space in the first place:

“But why, some say, the moon? Why choose this as our goal? And they may well ask why climb the highest mountain? Why, 35 years ago, fly the Atlantic? Why does Rice play Texas? We choose to go to the moon. We choose to go to the moon in this decade and do the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard, because that goal will serve to organize and measure the best of our energies and skills, because that challenge is one that we are willing to accept, one we are unwilling to postpone, and one which we intend to win, and the others, too.”  John F. Kennedy, “We choose to go to the Moon Speech,” September 12, 1962.

The moon.  It was a choice.  People rallied behind it.  It became the single aim of an entire sector of government research and development.  Those who believed in the goal made sacrifices to achieve it, including some who died in the process.  And they made it.  Seven years later, they made it to the surface of the moon.

To me, this illustrates one of my favorite quotes, one that I had to memorize in the fourth grade:

“Remember that you will never reach a higher standard than you yourself set. Then set your mark high, and step by step, even though it be by painful effort, by self-denial and sacrifice, ascend the whole length of the ladder of progress. Let nothing hinder you. Fate has not woven its meshes about any human being so firmly that he need remain helpless and in uncertainty. Opposing circumstances should create a firm determination to overcome them. The breaking down of one barrier will give greater ability and courage to go forward. Press with determination in the right direction, and circumstances will be your helpers, not your hindrances. Be ambitious, for the Master’s glory, to cultivate every grace of character. In every phase of your character building you are to please God. This you may do; for Enoch pleased Him though living in a degenerate age. And there are Enochs in this our day.”  Christ’s Object Lessons, p. 331-332.

Last school year I purchased a new laptop computer, and in the process of transferring files from my old Mac, my photos became disorganized and scattered between different places on my hard drive. I’ve been trying to put them in order for the last few months, but today I realized a simple way to import them all into iPhoto, so all I would have to do is compile them into broad categories.

As I sorted through photos, memory after memory came rushing back through my mind: full-time ministry, canvassing, graduating from college, painting the rock.  The photos stretched back over four years. And all I could think was, “where in the world has all of this time gone?”ti

This made me think of a conversation earlier this week where a friend told another friend that the reason we value time is because we were not made for time to run out, but rather for eternity, and yet our reality does not conform to our design (for now). The Bible says, “He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man’s heart.” Ecclesiastes 3:11.

I can truly say that God has made so much in my life beautiful in His time, bringing me into friendships that I value more than anything else in this world. And that concept of eternity is definitely in my heart too. As the last grains quickly slip through the hourglass of this summer, I don’t want it to end.  I love being near to my family, and close to my friends. I cannot imagine this coming to an end.

What seems only a distant dream right now will be reality again when I soon return to Virginia to begin my second year of law school. And I’m tempted to be sad, dejected, depressed.

And yet, one of the verses that came up when our theme for ASC at UM was “Remember” (2005-2006) keeps coming back to mind:

“Remember not the former things,
nor consider the things of old.
Behold, I am doing a new thing;
now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?
I will make a way in the wilderness
and rivers in the desert.”
Isaiah 43:18,19

Telling a historian not to remember seems a futile command. But I appreciate what the text says nonetheless. Yes, God has done incredible things in the past, and I am eternally grateful for those evidences of His kindness in my life. But  He is not finished yet.  He can create a new thing, out of apparent impossibility, something that will also be worth looking back over.

Yes, I will cherish my last two weeks in Michigan (just writing that ties my heart up in knots). But I won’t let the memory keep me from looking forward to see what new thing the Lord is brining. The best is yet to come.

Figures of history have gripped my imagination and retained my wonder since I was a little girl.  A character didn’t have to do much to interest me.  The very fact that people remember them piqued my curiosity.  People like Abraham Lincoln, the Pharohs, Annie Oakley.  People who existed before modern postal systems, let alone the Google age of information sharing.  Yet somehow, there was something about each of them, that over the decades, centuries, millennia between when they stopped walking this earth and I began to, people have found a need to not only preserve their memory but pass it to the next generation.

So I majored in history in college, to learn more about these people and why we remember them.  Maybe the hidden motivation of my heart was to find out how to make sure history remembers me too.

This week I bought a book at Barnes and Noble, The Sabbath, by Abraham Joshua Heschel.  A friend recommended the author, the topic always interests me, and I was looking for a distraction from Tort Law.  It’s the perfect distraction.  Easy to read yet profound, I often find myself picking it up instead of my textbooks, to read just a chapter to rest my mind for a bit.

In the book I recently read an allegory of a rabbi critical of the Roman rule of Israel, not just because they were oppressive rulers, but because of their very approach to life.  Emphasis on space, on grandour.  As Heschel analyzed the rabbi, compared him and his philosophy for living to the Roman approach, he indicated that there are two concepts of eternity competing with each other illustrated here.

The first is the Roman perspective.  To live eternally is to live on in history, to live your life in such a way that you will be remembered for eternity, even after you die.  That was the only Roman concept of the afterlife.

The second is the rabbi’s perspective.  To live as one aspiring for eternal life.

Two completely different lifestyles pursue these perspectives.  Both perspectives require intentionality on the part of the actor.  They way you view eternity determines the way you live your life.  If you are living your life to be remembered for eternity, you may be disqualifying yourself from living eternally.

Which makes me examine my own life. Am I living my life simply to be remembered for eternity but not to live eternally?  Because if that is the case, I have little hope.  This earth will only last so long, and even as long as it does, the Bible is clear.  “For of the wise as of the fool there is no enduring remembrance, seeing that in the days to come all will have been long forgotten.”  Ecclesiastes 2:16.

Yet, I can’t help but think that there’s nothing wrong with the desire to live a life that is remembered by history.  “…Also, He has put eternity into man’s heart…”  Ecclesiastes 3:11.  “I perceived that whatever God does endures forever; nothing can be added to it, nor anything taken from it. God has done it, so that people fear before Him.”  Ecclesiastes 3:14.

Because we are created in the image of God, and what God makes lasts forever, it only seems natural as His children that we have the hope and expectation that what we do, what we make, what we say, will have an impact and be remembered.

I think it goes back to the CS Lewis quote from my last post.  Aim at heaven, you get the earth thrown in.  Aim at the earth, and you get neither.  Aim at the history books, and you may not even make it in there.  Aim for that relationship with God, where He gives eternal life, and He will make your life one that will impact others, maybe one that will even make the history books.

I don’t just want to be remembered by history.  I want to live for eternity.